“Stay at Home” Practice Run

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I had to stay out of work today because my mother, who is the primary daycare provider for our two year old daughter Tate, has been sick and wound up at the hospital for testing last night.  Long story, but she will be fine – just an infection.  Due to this, I was a “stay at home mom” for the day.  I have three daughters ages 16, 13 and 2, and I have always gone right back to work after my maternity leaves; either 6 or 8 weeks at the most.  Therefore, I have never experienced the “stay at home” lifestyle.  I have always thought it would be wonderful, but we never felt like we made enough money to make me staying at home work out (versus the things we wanted to spend our money on anyway).  The only times I have stayed home from work in my own home were because either myself or, more likely, one of the children were sick.  I was excited about the prospect of being home on a work/school day with no real agenda.

So the big girls went dutifully off to high school and middle school.  I laid in bed, soaking in the morning, thinking “This is great!  I could really relish being a stay at home mom!”  Tate, our 2 year old daughter, was still sleeping and I got to drift off back to sleep.  Glorious!  What a productive day I was going to have!  I was excited about getting a lot done on my day at home.

Here are some of the things I hoped to accomplish during my day:

  1. Work out:  I finally got up and decided I have enough time to work out.  What a great way to begin my day.  Tate woke up, we snuggled.  I got her milk in a sippy cup and breakfast, and then found her favorite show on TV so she could occupy herself while I worked out.  She was in the next room and I could lean my head out of the room and see her on the couch.  I was doing a workout DVD that lasted 30 minutes.  After the first 10 minutes, I got a call from work and talked about 5 minutes.  Back to the workout.  I did about 10 more minutes and Tate came in and insisted that I stop working out.  I don’t know why she hates me working out so much, but she hates it with a passion.  Two days ago, she pulled the hair at the front of my head out of the ponytail while she was trying to stop me from doing sit-ups.  I finally got her settled back down and started the workout again.  Another call from work and I talked about 10 minutes.  I went back to the DVD and was in the last 6 minutes when Tate reappeared.  Sit-ups again, which I guess render me slower than her.  She jumped on top of me and repeatedly said “Mommy stop working out!”  I got her off of me and she ran to the laptop and closed it.  This of course shut off the DVD.  I would have to wait for the computer to come back on, find the file on the DVD, fast-forward it to the last 6 minutes to finish the workout………..instead, I quit.
  2. Take a Shower:  I thought I have time to take a quick shower.  I do this a lot with Tate around.  She will often stand outside the shower and talk to me until I am done.  As I am about halfway through with the shower, I hear the toilet flush.  I ask her what she is doing.  She says, “Flushing money.”  Luckily she was only flushing coins she had found on my husband’s dresser.  I had to get out of the shower and talk to her about this.  I then get back in the shower and this time was able to finish.  As I am getting out of the shower and drying off, I see Tate with scissors and she takes off running out of the bathroom with them.  My naked self runs after her down the hall until I catch her and confiscate the scissors.  I then ask her what she was doing with the scissors and she said, “I need to cut the eyes out of the Bubble Guppies.”  For those of you who don’t know, these are cute, little cartoon characters with an adorable show. I am not sure what was wrong with their eyes that warranted them having to have them cut out, but……scary!  What have they done wrong??? 
  3.  Get Dressed:  As I was getting dressed after the shower.  I hear Tate talking and saying things about cleaning.  The toilet is in a small “water closet” and she is in there.  As I walk in, I see she has the toilet brush.  It is not unusual for her to help clean the toilet bowl with me, so I am not immediately alarmed.  Then she took the brush, dipped it in the toilet and began to wash the wall.  I looked a little closer and then could see that the entire floor in front of the toilet was wet with toilet water, as was one wall.  Yuck!!!  But what could I say?  She thought she was being helpful.  I promptly grabbed one of my husband’s t-shirts to clean it all up.  I think I grabbed his shirt in a fit of resent that he wasn’t there to help me at that moment.  He doesn’t have to know.
  4.  Cooking Lunch:  Tate was playing in the den, which is connected to the kitchen, while I began fixing lunch.  This went well for a while.  Then I noticed she was very quiet.  I found her by the bowl of the dog’s water.  She had gotten a measuring cup out of a drawer and was DRINKING IT!!!!!  Gross!  Then I looked around and saw that her oldest sister’s shoes were beside Tate.  A camel color, Lucky brand, pair of leather ballet flats.  On closer inspection, I saw that both shoes were filled to the brim with water.  Yes, the entire volume of these shoes filled with water.  The good news is that they weren’t leaking.  Not really sure why I thought this was good news, but it was certainly impressive.  So for those of you who find yourselves stranded on a deserted island, wearing your Lucky ballet flats, the great news is now you know what a useful tool you have brought along.  Part footwear, part drinking vessel.  You’re welcome.  Thanks Tate!

While I was cleaning up the water and the shoes, she found the permanent markers.  She drew on an upholstered chair with two markers before I could get to her!  Fortunately, this is an ancient chair that we were already planning on having recovered.

She’s like a baby ninja!  So super fast!  It is truly unbelievable how quickly she can get into things.  As I am trying to clean up one mess, she is creating another!  The rest of the day proceeded in a similar manner.  I am pooped!

For these reasons, she earns least favorite today.  I truly adore her, but she is BUSY!!!

Daily tally:

Aubrie 0/0, Bella 0/0, Tate 0/-1

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